We are now several months into the New Year and the calendar day pages are flipping fast. The question arises, how are we doing on our resolutions for this year?
Many of us follow conventional wisdom and gather together with friends and others on the eve of the New Year to review all the ways in which we are deficient as successful people. We are unsuccessful for a variety of reasons, and perhaps after a few drinks loosened our tongues, we admitted our shortcomings and resolved to bring our scores up to par.
Whether we vocalized them to friends or simply admitted them to ourselves, we made a lot of really ambitious promises. As the first month of the New Year played out, we realized we either have no intention or are incapable of keeping those promises.
So why can’t we keep those promises to ourselves?
For one, the guardian of the promises is us, an easy taskmaster; quick to inject reasons for delay and quick to forgive compliance.
For another, the resolutions are poorly thought out and for a third reason they generally require us to be someone we are not.
Sooner or later we will realize that we don’t do well with major changes in direction, even if it is resolved with the deepest intention.
Habits, as someone once described, are developed in the manner of a silken thread being woven into a cord. The thread becomes thicker and thicker with each occurrence acting as a reinforcement, until it thickens into a Gordian knot.
Now this is a good thing for good habits, but bad for those habits not so good.
The Gordian knot of legend was made so complex, that no one could undo it. Alexander the Great tried and could not, so he cut it in two with a single blow from his sword.
Now cutting a Gordian knot of habit or lifestyle with a single blow is romantic but not practical for most of us unless it involves having surgery.
In reality we need to change things on a much smaller scale.
We won’t do well and shouldn’t try to change our life in a single day or single week or single month. What we need is a series of fresh starts and modest changes. Small things we can change are very important.
Instead of seeing how far away the end is on our huge projects, we need to break them into smaller projects. These smaller projects can be constantly restarted if necessary, moving forward in small increments and needing less and less work to complete.
Constant moving forward in small increments means constant accomplishment.
Two examples we may resolve are quitting smoking and weight loss. Many of us want to quit smoking for a number of reasons, but the process of leaving the addiction is doomed to failure without a plan, and maybe some help.
What if we counted our number of smokes in a day, and reduced it by one every week, and smoked only half? It’s just an idea. And if we slipped back to a higher level, it probably would be fewer than when we started.
Don’t focus on failure, just restart from the new level.
In the area of weight loss, many of us feel we must lose tons of weight. It is overwhelming just to think about it. But what if the number was only down to the next five-pound mark on the scale? That wouldn’t be too bad. The most we have to lose will be five pounds. Once we are solid at that level we can restart and focus on the next level.
A word of caution here. We all know that diet and exercise in combination will bring us to our goal, but starvation denies us the fuel to burn calories. We have no energy, we lose muscle mass, and our adaptable body becomes scrawny and learns to live on virtually nothing.
In my early college days, I could have earned a PhD in cramming techniques. I really believed I could learn a foreign language in three days. But life is a great teacher, and eventually I got the “plan ahead” concept right.
By embracing the “plan ahead” concept and focusing on small changes and adjustments to our lifestyles every day, we can conquer huge goals.
And our “small goal” achievements will tell us when we should adjust goals up or down.
This method is great news for the next New Years party. We will not have to make resolutions we have no plan for and no intention of keeping. We will know that we have been resolving and accomplishing every day during the year, and we can really enjoy that party.
It is time for us to effect solutions. Make the list. Make the plan. Today.
Live a Vital life.
Inspiration for this article comes from Merlin Mann’s 43 Folders
Command a vital life. Live free.
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