Next to go is exercise.  We think we can use that extra time to knock off some of those tasks on our plate.  But without the exercise keeping our bodies regulated, our metabolism slows, we tire faster, tasks take longer, and we feel like we are moving through molasses. 

Rest and activity are our bodies’ prime stress relievers.  Without time spent exercising to keep us sharp and tuned, and time spent sleeping to repair our bodies and realign our minds, stress piles up, resulting in more frustration and anger, the great killer. 

Anger a killer?  Studies show that stress and anger can cascade our bodies into life-threatening states, raising blood pressure, causing headaches and back pain, stomach and colon trouble, and perhaps even embolisms and strokes. 

The best course is to avoid the stress in the first place.  But many times, it finds us, in the form of loss of personal control over our lives or our jobs, facing financial hardship, loss of a loved one or potential loss if they are seriously ill or in the military and deployed to a danger zone.  The reasons are many. 

If we are the caregiver or just the one responsible for keeping things running, we must remember that we can’t do that job if we are sick.  It is our responsibility to deal with both the situation and the stress, so we should protect ourselves and not feel guilty about taking some personal time. 

And how do we do that?  The first two methods we can easily guess. 

Get enough sleep and rest.  We know we have enough sleep if we wake up without an alarm, even if we lay in bed for a short time planning our day.  How much sleep?  As much as it takes.  Some people can get by on six hours sleep and others need nine.  Experiment with the length and don’t cheat.  If we feel we can’t fall sleep, pretend.  Lay still with eyes closed, clear the mind, and sleep will come.  The reason counting sheep works is because it is boring. 

Exercise; work out; walk in the sun.  Fresh air and sunshine are miracles of stress relief. Find an activity to enjoy that will take the place of the worry and stress for a short time.   

Take one thing at a time.  When many things are hitting us at once, it is like a hurricane.  Anyone would just cover up under an onslaught.  Break big projects into smaller tasks, stay focused and finish one thing or reach a checkpoint before starting another.  

Learn to say “no” to requests if they interfere with the main task.  If we have no time to catch up now, it will get worse with more responsibility.  Turn the tables.  Ask for help.  There are always small chores that steal our time but can be done by anyone.  People will respond to our calls for help if they see we are buckling under the pressure. 

We should share our feelings.  Letting it out decreases the pressure level.  Two people sharing feelings halve the pressure.  We all have others in our circle of friends, family and associates who share their feelings when they are in a stressful situation.  

If you don’t have someone you can confide in, get someone.  Build a relationship of trust with another by sharing your experience and being a good listener when they share theirs.  Join a mutual support group. 

Take time during the day to calm down and take a time out.  Power naps or quiet “do not disturb” meditations of 20 minutes resets our system. 

There is no easy solution to the stress many of us deal with on a daily basis.  We do the best we can, we go as far as we can, and should be satisfied with that. 

We know we would do more if we could. 

Command a vital life. Live free.

It is easy to get our schedules bunched up as well as our blood pressure; and very easy to be late.  Habitually late

If we were meeting a potential romantic partner or employer, I would bet we would move everything out of our way to arrive on time, especially if it is the first time. 

Whether it is a date or meeting, over time we get comfortable and it becomes part of our routine.  We push the schedule and insert small tasks before we have to leave and they take longer than we thought.  We get more done, but are habitually late. 

Our blood pressure rises and we feel the stress squeezing us. 

So, how can we defend ourselves?  Don’t be late.  How can we do that? 

Make each time like the first time. 

This presupposes our schedule is not like an emergency room disaster.  If it is, we can do two things; try to lighten our schedule or become experts at time management or a combination of both. 

We can try to say no to some meetings and events if they make our lives too stressful.  We can try to limit activities with our young ones or involve other family members to help out. 

But at work, we might have a boss who doesn’t understand anything except his own needs, and drives us relentlessly.  We can probably discuss it with him, but he wouldn’t understand our hectic schedule.  We can ask him to prioritize the meetings he wants us to attend on time and without stress.  And he may be deaf to our suggestions. 

In that case, a decision should be made.  Do we want to die of stress on our present job, or live with another, better job? 

And if we manage to lower our activity, appointment and meeting schedule, we can then work to lower our stress by allowing ourselves a pace to get there on time or, even a little early.  How?  Apply a little project schedule planning.

Planning

Everything we do that involves interdependent activities is a project.  There are things we can control and things we cannot.  The secret is to recognize the difference, and plan each leg.  

First we need to do some calculations to know our personal numbers—adjust them for each particular case:

• Know how much sleep we need if we have a super-important appointment like a job interview the next day.  Let’s enter 8 hours.
• We are not robots, so it takes some time to fall asleep – more if we are apprehensive or nervous about the next day’s events.  Let’s enter 30 minutes. 
• We are not firemen, so leaping out of bed fully dressed and ready for action will not happen.  Most people need about 90 minutes to rise, shower, clear our morning fog, and dress.  It wouldn’t hurt to add 30 minutes for miscellaneous items like de-icing the car in winter, walking the family pet, herding our young ones and making breakfast.  Let’s enter 120 minutes to get out the door from the sound of the alarm. 
• How long will it take to get to our destination?  If we are driving, is there gas in the car?  If we take public transportation, do we know the bus or train schedule?  Would it hurt us to take an earlier bus or train in case there were delays?  Do we drop our young ones off on our way? 

This is a personal estimate of travel time, and keeping abreast of weather conditions and construction sites will help make the number more accurate.  We all like to estimate our travel time as if it was Sunday midnight, but most commuters commute at about the same time.  Vary the time with experience.  Pad on some extra minutes, just in case. 

Preparation

Next, prepare the night before.  Put gas in the car.  Organize what we will need and place it by the front door to avoid forgetting it.  Lay out clothes for our young ones and ourselves.  Prepare lunches and store them in the refrigerator. 

Check directions to our destination if it is unfamiliar.  If we are driving, it wouldn’t hurt to plan an alternate route in case of jammed traffic. 

I used to take a route to work through a large metropolitan center.  It was the most direct route, but every day, there were accidents and construction and my stress levels soared.  Then I planned an alternate route around the metropolis.  It was slightly longer, but less traveled, and the time was constant every day.  I actually enjoyed the drive. 

Distractions

The last thing I like to do before retiring is to check my e-mail for any change in plans.  I can do it in the morning, but 5 minutes usually turns into 25 and I fall behind schedule. 

This falls into the category of distractions that can put us behind schedule.  Other distractions may be an unexpected phone call.  Some of us cannot resist the sound of a ringing phone.  This is a discipline issue.  Let it go to voice mail unless it is someone with critical news.  We can call them back while enroute or when we arrive early at our meeting. 

Other distractions may include young ones out of sorts; they don’t like what they have to wear; they don’t like breakfast; they didn’t do their homework and a big report is due today.  Sorry, I can’t help you there.

If this is a regular occurrence perhaps we need to build it into the schedule.

Scheduling

Finally, we should time ourselves to be at the right point at the right time in the schedule, so we’re ready to leave on time. 

If getting up is our problem, we can set the bedside alarm ahead to compensate for hitting the snooze button too often, or we can set the alarm out of reach or out of the room to force us up to shut off the annoyance.  Most cell phones have a multiple alarm capability that can be set a few minutes later than the bedside alarm with a second alarm going off when we should be leaving the house. 

Practice

In truth, this approach requires discipline to keep to the schedule, but with practice it gets easier. 

In a recent CareerBuilder survey, 20 percent of workers admitted to getting to work late at least once per week.  12 percent confessed to at least twice per week.  Constantly arriving 15 minutes late cost our employers a week’s pay in lost productivity over the course of a year. 

And this is no economy to make our employer feel we are cheating them. 

Payoff

Arriving early gives us time; time to de-stress, to read an article, write a letter, make a phone call or work on something personal while waiting for the meeting or our work shift to start.

Arriving early gets noticed.  Over the years of my business career, the promotions and raises always went to those who arrived early, even if they did not stay one minute past quitting time.  Executives are in their jobs partially because of their timeliness, and they notice those who are like them. 

And finally, routinely arriving late for our date or meetings shows everyone we have little respect for them or ourselves. 

Command a vital life. Live free.